It starts with a rush. Your heart races, your mind spins, and suddenly one person feels like gravity itself. You can’t stop replaying their smile, their voice, their energy.
You tell yourself: This must be it, the love of my life. But here’s the truth: that intensity isn’t always love. Most of the time, it’s your shadow.
Why You Get Hooked So Fast
When someone mirrors your dreams, your words, your energy, it feels like recognition. But often it isn’t them you’re seeing, it’s you. The part of yourself you’ve suppressed, denied, or never received.
And that’s the dangerous part. What feels like destiny is often just familiarity. You’re not drawn to their soul, you’re drawn to the wound they awaken.
That’s why the ones who manipulate move quickly. They create passion, not peace. They hook you before their mask slips, because if you saw who they really were, insecure, inconsistent, unavailable, controlling, stingy — you’d walk away.
The Deeper Purpose
As painful as it feels, there is purpose in this pull.
Every intense attraction is a mirror, showing you the parts of yourself still longing to be healed.
You’re not falling for them. You’re falling for the unfinished story inside of you. The rejection you never made peace with. The love you had to fight for. The safety you never felt.The universe doesn’t bring these people to complete you. It brings them to reveal what’s incomplete within you.
How to Heal and Protect Yourself
The work begins when you pause and ask different questions:
What does this person really remind me of?
Do I feel safe with them, or just addicted?
Am I choosing them, or is my wound choosing for me?
True healing is giving yourself what you’ve been begging to receive from others. Safety. Validation. Love without conditions.
And protection? It’s in slowing down. Because real love doesn’t need urgency. It shows up steady, consistent, calm. The fireworks fade, but safety doesn’t.
Red Flags vs. Soul Truth
Intensity is not a sign of “the one.” It’s a signal. A message.
It might be a red flag: love-bombing, hot-and-cold games, withholding affection.
Or it might be a trigger: your psyche trying to rewrite an old wound through a new body.
Either way, it’s not fate. It’s information.
What Love Really Is
The darkest truth about attraction is this: you don’t always fall for who’s good for you. You fall for who feels like home, even if home was painful.
But the moment you see it for what it is, the spell breaks. You can stop mistaking intensity for love. You can stop letting your wounds choose for you.
Because real love is not about the mask, the illusion, or the chase. Real love is about commitment — not the kind that traps you in someone’s shadow, but the kind that lifts you into the higher good of the connection.
It’s commitment to truth. To growth. To showing up as your whole self and allowing the other to do the same.
Real love won’t make you panic. It won’t make you question your worth. It won’t keep you addicted to the chase.
Real love feels steady. It feels like calm. It feels like truth. Not the storm, but the ground beneath your feet.
Love, Mara